Irish Wakes and Irish Toasts
The Irish Wake
Preparations for the wake began soon after death. All clocks in the house were stopped as a sign of respect, and women gathered to bathe and dress the body. The deceased often wore white garments, and if a man died, his face was shaved clean before being dressed. The body was then laid out for viewing on a table or bed and was attended until the burial. All mirrors in the household were also covered, removed, or turned around.
The 'keen' itself is thought to have been constituted of stock poetic elements (the listing of the genealogy of the deceased, praise for the deceased, emphasis on the woeful condition of those left behind etc.) set to vocal lament. While generally carried out by one or several women, a chorus may have been intoned by all present. Physical movements involving rocking, kneeling or clapping accompanied the keening woman ('bean caoinadh') who was often paid for her services
The Irish also celebrated the life of the deceased and shared food and drink throughout the wake. Music, dancing, and physical games made the wake feel more like a party. The Catholic church has tried numerous times (unsuccessfully) throughout history to abolish the consumption of alcohol at wakes. Though it is a time of sadness, the presence of friends and family makes it more bearable, and there is generally great joviality as the deceased is fondly remembered; indeed, there is tradition in some parts of the country to play a game of cards and include a hand for the deceased.
There was always a certain unwritten ritual that sympathizers observed when calling to the Wake house. First there was a visit to the room where the corpse was laid out to say a prayer and pass the usual compliments about how well he/she looked even in death.
A quick look around took in the crucifix, lighted candles on a little table and the well laundered linen on the bed. In some families bed linen was kept specifically for this purpose and even though it might be a hundred years old it could be as white as the driven snow. In nearly every area there was a woman or two who washed and laid out the dead. They too came in for a word of compliment before leaving the room. 'Didn't Cassie make a great job of laying him out. What would the place do without her' was a statement rather than a question. Then came the expressions of sympathy. Every relative, even down to the most distant in-law was given a perfunctory handshake and a muttered 'Sorry for your trouble'. The real sympathy was reserved for the spouse or immediate family. The caller was invited to sit down. If no seat was available someone would be sure to get up and offer it, glad of the opportunity to slip out unobserved. Neighbors who had come in to help would go around offering snuff, and plug tobacco and clay pipes. There was always a 'wee wan' for the men or a small port for the ladies. In more recent times these were replaced by tea, cake and sandwiches.
People kept calling into the Wake house all day and at midnight the Rosary was recited. After the prayers all except those who were sitting up all night soon dispersed. Supper was served and the women usually went to the corpse room while the men remained in the kitchen. It was at this stage that the games and storytelling got under way. No doubt a stranger unaccustomed to the ways would look on this merriment as irreverent, or at the very least hypocritical, and consider it a contradiction of the real feelings of expressed sympathy. But this light relief had a certain therapeutic value for the grieving family while at the same time helping those who were keeping vigil to pass the night, and so it was an accepted part of Waking the dead.
There were certain games that were reserved for Wakes only; like 'Hide the Gulley', 'Priest of the Parish' and 'Riddle me Ree'. In the West of Ireland musicians used to play at Wakes, and caoiners (professional criers) were employed to display affected grief. All over the Northwest, and possibly throughout the whole country, all servile work and entertainment ceased in a townland when someone died there. Up to about forty years ago dances would not be held in Donegal town if there was a death in the vicinity and if they had already been arranged they were cancelled or postponed.
"Kilty Larkin looked ever so grand laid out in the best room. There was none the equal of my mother, Mairead, in County Donegal when it came to scrubbing up and shaving and tidying a corpse for the waking... When we arrived at the cottage, Kilty's bed was burning in the yard as a further measure to ward of the fairies and inside he was stretched out on a wooden slab, held up by four chairs and covered saint-like with a fine white linen sheet... except for his face and his hands and his two big toes, which were tied together to keep him from returning as a ghost. Candles flickered about his head and a new pair of boots were at his feet to help his walk through purgatory. His eyes had been closed restful-like with a new carved stone crucifix on his chest and rosary beads entwined in folded hands. ...he surely looked like St. Columba himself, all stretched out and lovely..."
-- Uris op.cit.p.p13.
Irish Birthday Toasts
May you live to be 100 years, with one extra year to repent.
We drink to your coffin. May it be built from the wood of a hundred year old oak tree that I shall plant tomorrow.
May God grant you many years to live, for sure he must be knowing, the earth has angels all too few and heaven is overflowing...
May the doctor never earn a pound out of you.
May the good Lord take a liking to you...
But not too soon!
May you die in bed at 95, shot by a jealous spouse.
Irish Toasts to Drinking
A bird with one wing can't fly. (Said to encourage someone to take a second drink)
It is better to spend money like there's no tomorrow
than to spend tonight like there's no money!
That the tap may be open when it rusts!
My friends are the best friends
Loyal, willing and able.
Now let's get to drinking!
All glasses off the table!
Here's to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one.
A pretty girl and an honest one.
A cold pint-- and another one!
Here's to a temperance supper,
With water in glasses tall,
And coffee and tea to end with--
And me not there at all!
When money's tight and hard to get,
and your horse is also ran,
When all you have is a heap of debt,
a pint of plain is your only man.
Here's to being single...
Drinking doubles...
And seeing triple!
I drink to your health when I'm with you,
I drink to your health when I'm alone,
I drink to your health so often,
I'm starting to worry about my own!
Here's to women's kisses,
and to whiskey, amber clear;
Not as sweet as a woman's kiss,
but a darn sight more sincere!
Irish Toasts to Friends and Family
May you have warm words on a cold evening,
a full moon on a dark night,
and a smooth road all the way to your door.
There are good ships,
and there are wood ships,
The ships that sail the sea.
But the best ships, are friendships,
And may they always be.
May the hinges of our friendship never grow rusty.
Here's to you and yours,
And to mine and ours,
And if mine and ours ever come
Across you and yours,
I hope you and yours will do
As much for mine and ours,
As mine and ours have done
For you and yours!
To live above with the Saints we love,
Ah, that is the purest glory.
To live below with the Saints we know,
Ah, that is another story!
May the lilt of Irish laughter
lighten every load.
May the mist of Irish magic
shorten every road...
And may all your friends remember
all the favours you are owed!
Here's to the land of the shamrock so green,
Here's to each lad and his darlin' colleen,
Here's to the ones we love dearest and most.
May God bless old Ireland, that's this Irishman's toast!
I have known many,
and liked not a few,
but loved only one
and this toast is to you.
Irish Everyday Toasts
May you be in heaven a full half hour
before the devil knows your dead.
May you live as long as you want
and never want as long as you live.
May your heart be light and happy,
May your smile be big and wide,
And may your pockets always have
a coin or two inside!
Always remember to forget
The troubles that passed away.
But never forget to remember
The blessings that come each day.
May you always have a clean shirt, a clear conscience,
and enough coins in your pocket to buy a pint!
May the face of every good news
and the back of every bad news be towards us.
May neighbours respect you,
Trouble neglect you,
The angels protect you,
And heaven accept you.
May you have the hindsight to know where you've been,
The foresight to know where you are going,
And the insight to know when you have gone too far.
May the saddest day of your future
be no worse than the happiest day of your past.
May those that love us, love us.
And those that don't love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if he doesn't turn their hearts,
May he turn their ankles,
So we'll know them by their limping.
May misfortune follow you the rest of your life, and never catch up.
May you have food and raiment,
a soft pillow for your head.
May you be forty years in heaven
before the devil knows you're dead.
May your mornings bring joy
and your evenings bring peace...
May your troubles grow less
as your blessings increase!
May you get all your wishes but one,
so that you will always have something to strive for!
'Lucky' Irish Toasts
May the luck of the Irish
Lead to happiest heights
And the highway you travel
Be lined with green lights.
Wherever you go and whatever you do,
May the luck of the Irish be there with you.
If you're enough lucky to be Irish...
You're lucky enough!
May you have all the happiness
and luck that life can hold-
And at the end of all your rainbows
may you find a pot of gold.
May your pockets be heavy-
Your heart be light,
And may good luck pursue you
Each morning and night.